All I want for Christmas...

You ever wake up from a really good dream and you try to go back to sleep? Or you get the flu and you promise yourself that you would appreciate normal life so much more if you could just get back to it? That's the way I feel right about now. I just want things to go back to the way they were.

I love my best friend! Don't know what I'd do without her!

The past always seems much better than it was. I remember when I used to be so excited for Christmas.. I'd stay up tossing and turning all night. Last night was just another night for me. I realized I wasn't that little girl excited for Christmas anymore. I always knew it would happen.. But it caught me off guard. I guess you know you're really growing up when the only things you really want for Christmas can't be bought in a store... or given as a gift.

Have you ever just wanted to cry because you know that things will never be the same? Or just want to go to sleep as soon as you can so you don't have to think about things? What if that's the only way you can get things off your mind? It's a funny feeling.

This Christmas has been very different. I dont know why. Maybe it's because there is no snow. Maybe I'm just not into Christmas as much as I used to be. I love the feeling of being with my family every Christmas. I get to see all my little cousins so excited and happy! It never fails to put a smile on my face. My family has a lot of traditions. Every Christmas eve we all get together and the best part about it is that usually we are hardly missing anyone. Everyone is there.

I love the holidays just because I get to see everyone who is important to me. I get to spend time with the ones I love! I really couldn't ask for more than that. I am so grateful to have so many amazing people in my life who make me smile everyday. I am truly the luckiest girl in the world! I would like to especially thank my mom... The past few weeks I have been very hesitant on certain situations and I NEVER thought that my mom would be able to understand how I felt about it. It amazes me how supportive she is. I know it is hard for her to accept that I have to make my own decisions, but it means so much to me that she is letting me grow up and understanding how I feel about everything. So many people keep trying to tell me how to live my life and make decisions, and I understand where they are coming from but I guess at some point I have to choose what I want. It has only made me appreciate my mom more.

My boy! <3

Earlier I mentioned I just want things back to the way they were... But I guess I need to enjoy every day I have. One thing I have learned is everything gets better in time. Most of you who know me surely understand that I am the most impatient girl there is. I don't have any patience, but I sure try to! I am so grateful for my amazing family and friends! <3 I hope everyone in my life knows how much they mean to me! I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas!! <3